Showing posts from 2011

Single Ladies Beware

10 Reasons You Should   Know You Are Dating a Loser/Asshole/Freak/Psycho 1. The guy doesn't have a job.   If you're reading this, it's likely you're an adult. And if you're an adult, paying bills, and living your life... then you should have a job.  Otherwise, you're living off of the government and while "shit happens", that "shit" shouldn't be happening for more than 6 months... get my drift? 2. Poor hygiene (i.e. bad breath...stinky pits..etc.) Really, you should be old enough to know that being dirty is gross.  If you weren't taught how to take care of yourself, then you should really have taught yourself by now. If you're a man in your late 20's or early 30's, you should have been embarrassed enough by now to know better.  Or has no one told you how badly you smell? Or how grimey your teeth look? Or how greasy and stringy your hair seems...? 3. He thinks other guys are "cute" At thi

The Train Olympics

I travel two hours to and from work, five days out of the week. Yes, you read that correctly.  That's four hours of commuting time each day. I encounter all sorts of people and situations during these two hours of subtle hell. One situation I seem to encounter on a daily basis is something I like to call the Train Olympics. The Train Olympics consists of many different challenges while riding the subway. First, there is the Subway Race  This is where you must run up or down the stairs as you try to capture that train that just starts to pull into the station just as you're swiping your metrocard.  If you manage to make it to the train right before the doors literally close in your face, without losing an arm or leg, and without breaking your neck while running up or down the stairs, then you've won the battle and can now move on to the next round... Dual of the Seat ... During the mornings, I'm very lucky in that I always find a seat in the first train I t

Gnats From Hell

This morning, I came into work already half asleep and ready to call it a day. The non-stop rain still hadn't slowed down and it was a cloudy mess out there on Jamaica Avenue.  The day was destined to be a shitty one.  As I approached the office, I thought to myself, "Is today finally the day?" I was promised a promotion over the summer that I should have started a month ago, and here it is nearly mid-September and I'm still exactly where I was then:  A Bachelor's level employee doing Master's Level work and getting paid at an Associate's level. Well, not only was today NOT the day... I came to an office full of gnats literally floating around.  We've had this problem now for a few months, however, nothing has been done about it. Initially, these gnats were spotted by the "big boss lady" in a little body.  Same moody woman who promised me the promotion but has been delaying it at all costs and has hinted I may not even start my new po