Showing posts from July, 2013

Unsolicited Advice

Have you ever just felt like venting about a situation?
Just going off on a rant about nonsense because at that very moment you just feel like screaming?

If you are anything like me, all you want is for someone to listen, right?
Have them let you rant, maybe have that person throw in a "HELL YEAH!" or "I feel you!!" or "I hear that!!" or even "That bastard!!!" every once in a while and just have the conversation or rant die out.

But there's always that one person that you go to hoping they'll listen and instead, they offer unsolicited advice.
In other words, you are bitching about your day at work or that person whose attention you've been trying to get for a hot minute, and the one you're talking to starts giving you advice.
They say things like, "Why don't you do it this way...?"  or "Have you tried this?"

This irritates the SHIT out of me.


If I didn't straight out ask for your opinion, chances…

To Cope... Or Not To Cope

I watched my friend tear up pictures of her ex the other day and I told her that I found it interesting how we all cope with common situations in different ways.

She asked me what I meant and I explained that I never throw pictures away.  That the only time I tear pictures up is when I know I have another copy somewhere.  Or when it's in the heat of the moment.  I just usually store them away until I forget I have them... by the time I see them again, whatever good or bad feelings associated with the pictures are gone.

It made me think that maybe my way of coping is not the best way to cope.
For me the loss of a loved one through a break up or through the death is absolutely devastating.
Even if just for a moment.

I thought back to a friend's death years back in which I decided it was a good idea to start dating the man she thought was so perfect for me... and how that ended up not so perfect.

Or how I've been taking some somewhat crazy risks (in my book anyway) since ano…

Absence Makes the Heart Grow Fonder? NOT!!!

I was reading a book the other day that stated that if you're out of the picture long enough for someone, somehow that person would miss you more.

You know that saying, "Absence makes the heart grow fonder...."?

It sort of goes along with that whole "hard to get" scenario as well.

I started to think about whether I'm just an all around weirdo, abnormal or just plain fucked up.

Why? Because....

Absence has NEVER made my heart grow fonder.
On the contrary... the longer you are out of the picture the less I want to see you or deal with you.  Whatever feelings I may have developed for you will start to dwindle or completely go away, especially if we didn't leave off on the best terms.

For me it's all about, "Out of sight, out of mind!!"

I have come to the conclusion that many people treat others and follow societal, social and relationship rules according to the books they read, the documentaries they follow and assume that because those tech…

Love? Lust?

A couple of weeks ago, I took my friend, Matt, out for dinner for his birthday.  Matt and I used to date for a couple of years.  I broke it off nearly two years ago when I just got tired of the "dead end" that was us. 

We spent 3 years together and nothing ever resulted out of this "non-relationship."
"Going out" with him meant going to the local diner in his neighborhood or going to the movies.  By the time we actually did something more, like take a short and disastrous trip together, whatever affection or lust I felt for this man was gone.  

To be fair, there is a significant age difference between us so I'm sure that's part of it.  But at the end of the day, we just weren't compatible.  What I wanted he refused to offer me, and what he wanted was quite unreasonable and I refused to offer him. 

Matt and I had developed a friendship over the past couple of months. We greet with a quick hug and peck on the cheek and keep it moving, usually t…

Froggy Fridays: The Lowest of Them All

Last week... I received a lovely email.
My ex-headache... aka ex-non-boyfriend.... aka the biggest loser I've ever had the pleasure of engaging in anything with - decided to call me a psycho bitch, disgusting, lame and my absolute favorite - the lowest of them all!!!!

ME! A college educated woman who pays her own bills with help from no one, has a full time job that is considered a career by most AND is super hygenically clean! ME! The lowest of them all?!?!? Ha! Hilarious!!

I wish I can say that those words were hurtful.
They weren't.
I just don't care anymore.
His anger was deserved as I made a decision that same morning to send his sucia bitch  baby momma a cute little video of he and I back in December.
No it wasn't dirty! Get your mind out of the gutter please!
It was quite innocent and sort of sweet but obvious...
The best scene in the very short video is where he refers to me as "mine mine mine..."  as he looks into the camera...
It should've …

Sexuality's Thin Veil

My "long, lost friend," Chris, who I haven't seen since January (ahem ahem), reaches out to me the other morning because he thought he was going through some sort of mid life crisis... Mind you, he's 29.

I asked him why he felt like he was going through a crisis and he proceeded to tell me about some trysts that he's been involved in or thinking about engaging in.

My edited response was the following:

"While you may be going through a quarter life crisis, there's nothing wrong with getting in touch with yourself and your sexuality.  It's only as crazy as we allow it to be.  At the end of the day; there's a very thin line in the veil of love, friendship and sex."

Hopefully, that made him feel a little better.

The short and somewhat funny conversation got me thinking.
Had we not been raised thinking so many things in life were considered "taboo"... maybe we wouldn't be so opposed.

Maybe.... randomly making out with someone of the…


Many of us foolish women watched way too many Disney movies growing up.  I have made the decision that none of my children will watch any movies involving royalty and romance (i.e. Snow White, The Princess and the Frog, Cinderella, etc.).

Instead, they will read comic books such as Fables by Bill Willinghman to find out what happens to fairy tale characters AFTER their "...happily ever after...." If you don't know what I'm referring to, pick up the latest issue and you'll get an idea.

I spent a good portion of my life waiting for some sort of Prince Charming and when he didn't come along I started wasting my time on frog after frog until just recently. 

As a matter of fact, I have come to the conclusion that I have kissed way too many frogs in my life expecting them to magically turn into some prince.  As if somehow there is a dude out there who is magically going to meet my standards simply because I loved him enough.  There is no such thing as kissing (ak…

Sucia Bitch

A sucia bitch is a term penned by my friend, Omar, after I told her about a situation that my ex-non-boyfriend was (is?) involved in.

A sucia bitch has many different definitions and descriptions.  I'm going to touch base on a few.  For those of you who don't know what "sucia" is, it is the spanish term for dirty.

Now a lot of you reading this right now are thinking, "Oh yeahhh, I know sucia bitches! Those are dirty hoes or ratchet chickens..."
But you are mistaken.
A sucia bitch is a term that is reserved for a DIRTY woman.  A woman who isn't taking proper care of her own personal hygiene and/or of that of her own offspring.

Let me give you a few examples.

I know of one particular sucia bitch who is about 40 years old.  Her house is infested with roaches and rodents and her 1008 children all have lice and pass it from head to head on a regular basis.  Now, before you say, "Oh but the poor thing  has a million kids..."  That is NO excuse.  Th…

Friends with Benefits

Correct me if I'm wrong; but my understanding of the term "Friends with Benefits" is that you and the other person involved are engaging in a friendship with, perhaps,  some make out sessions or sex thrown in.

Is that assumption completely false?

According to the Urban Dictionary, "Friends with Benefits" is defined as:

Two friends who have a sexual relationship without being emotionally involved. Typically, two good friends who have casual sex without a monogamous relationship or any kind of commitment.

As opposed to a "Booty Call, which is defined as:
A late night summons -- often made via telephone -- to arrange clandestine sexual liaisons on an ad hoc basis. The key difference between calling this situation "Friends with Benefits" versus a typical "Booty Call" is to establish that those involved are in fact "friends" and do more than just have sex.

You know.... like talk and shit.

Those two people actually have conversations,…