Life After Death

It's been 2 months today since she passed so suddenly.
Her absence has not gone unnoticed.

I think about how different life is now.
All the responsibilities that my siblings and I have had to take on since her passing.
How proud she would have been, particularly of my sister, for how everything has been handled.

She is missed.

Life without her is certainly tough.
Not being able to call her all those many times things have occurred here and there.
Not being able to tell her I currently hold a 4.0 GPA in grad school... how happy she would've been...
I can hear her say, "That's my baby...!!!"

I wake up with her in mind.
I go to sleep with her in mind.
Normally, your mother is your first true love.
The first person you trust.
The first person you meet.
And in "normal" circumstances, the only person you can truly rely on throughout life.

She was my everything, really.
Everything happens for a reason... but the only reason I can see for her sudden passing was that she didn't take care of her health in the end and we didn't do enough to stay on top of her and that's it, she's gone.

Small positive things have come out of her passing, but the giant emptiness she's left in our hearts is still the same.

I cannot stress enough, the amazing person she truly was.
How people flocked to her energy.
How many people tried to bring her down due to their own insecurities and how strong she was as she strived for her goals throughout her life.

She was most definitely a woman to be reckoned with and we were all very lucky to have known her.

To honor her, I have promised to make the most of my time here.
And while it's a struggle to get my act together right now, I'm determined to do this and lucky beyond lucky to have the support of my love, my sister, my best friends... in order to move forward.
And somewhere on the other side, I can still hear her cheering me on.


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