Give Them Something To Talk About

I used to care about other people's thoughts and opinions about me and I think once I hit 26, 27, that all stopped.

I'd been paying rent, utilities and other bills and realized that these people weren't helping me, so therefore, nothing they did or said mattered to me.
It's very easy to write people off because at the end of the day, if those people aren't making any valid efforts to come through as the friends and the family they portray themselves to be, then why keep them around?

See... I was once that girl that always came through for people's events, no matter the cost, the anxiety, the difficulty of making it.
I was always the one who called and sent a gift and just followed through.
But when I realized that as you get older, priorities change for everyone, and you're no longer of any importance to certain individuals nor are they to you, I just stopped.

Their presence wasn't making a difference in my life, so why would their absence?

I don't have to show face simply because I'm afraid they're going to talk about me or vilify me if I don't because at the end of the day, they're going to find a reason to do so ANYWAY.
It won't matter if I pop up or come through.  That won't change their opinion of me and again, that opinion isn't worth a penny in my life.

I stopped being a people pleaser a long time ago and there are individuals that were in my life, that seemed to think this didn't apply to them... Boy were they shocked when I didn't come through for their events after two rough years they knew nothing about because they hadn't even bothered to shoot me a simple, "Hi, how are you text?" And if they had my "how I am response" was quickly dismissed, it was quickly followed by a request.... "Oh.. can you do me a favor?" or "Oh wow, so let's talk about me" or even better, judgments and unsolicited advice from people who know essentially nothing about anything.

Why was I going to continue to complain about having to go to events, I simply didn't want to go to in anticipation of the misery, anxiety and possible unnecessary debt for someone who wouldn't genuinely appreciate it anyway? And even more so, they probably wouldn't make the same sacrifices for me, nor had they ever in the past.

My mother's passing, validated my decisions as so many reached out to offer their condolences, but neither followed up once, nor made any attempt to actually support my family or I in our time of need.

My miserable appearance at their events wasn't going to make me a better person... it was only going to give me more reason to pout and complain and get myself all worked up and upset inside while faking in on the outside and who really wants to do that?

It's not that I wasn't happy for them.  It's simply that I didn't care.  And if I didn't care, then they weren't worth showing face for.... and they would've likely commented regardless of my presence there or not.

So when I watch other people putting themselves through unnecessary annoyances because they're concerned about how they're viewed, I am more than glad I've stopped that nonsense long ago.

Who has time to play pretend, when there are more important dire things going on in my own life and more important people to spend my precious time with?

Life is simply too short for such nonsense....


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