Distractions/Reminders

I believe that person who crawled under my skin and snuck their way into my feelings and very nearly succeeded in hooking me, came to me as a lesson... or a reminder.



I have been on this one track lately about how the only thing I need to be focusing on these days is me.  And I've had a plan that I've been sticking to.
I started with pursuing an actual career... and now I am going after another very big goal while working still hustling on the side.

I almost allowed myself to get sidetracked by an unnecessary distraction.
Why?
Because I thought I needed to fix something that didn't need fixing at all.
And because something about this distraction woke something up in me that's been sleeping for 3 years.

What I needed to do was sincerely apologize one for my previous behaviors - which I did - and keep it moving. 
What I actually did, was apologize more than once regarding my previous behaviors and lingered to see what would happen.

This, while knowing in my heart that this person is still hung up on someone or something that is not giving them a second thought or serving them any kind of purpose. 
We can all relate, right?
He would be ideal if he were in the right place at the right time and with the right person - who is clearly not me.
But because of his position, I very nearly allowed myself to start something in my head and heart that put me exactly where I am today and even though, I'm on the right path, that path is delayed due to the previous distraction that got me here.
NEVER AGAIN.
What would have happened is that this person would have totally disregarded my feelings (which they were already doing a little bit - unintentionally, I guess) and then they would have said, "Oh look, I fixed myself, thanks for riding along with me! Peace out!"
And where would I be? Left to pick up the pieces yet again. 
And who has time for that? Not me.

Thank goodness it was a distraction that I immediately addressed with just a sting of feelings I caught ahead of time, no matter how disappointing and disheartening.......
The brief sadness was worth having over another re-do though.
I'm glad, however,  to have paid attention to this distraction and make an exit.


I think it's so important to focus on yourself, but in doing so, not to drag anyone with you when you know you don't have their best interest at heart.
Not because you're an unfeeling monster, but because you're too busy worrying about you.

I'm grateful for these reminders to stay on track with what I am doing rather than allow myself to get sidetracked.
I am so very close to that second big goal that it would be a shame to allow this to turn into an over dramatic feel of the past.







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